I wish you... the very worst!

Suppose you have a genie that will grant you one wish. You make your wish but he is determined to make it your undoing. Your job is to spoil the last poster's wish as cruelly as humanly possible and to get your own wish granted!

Example:
Wish: I wish I had enough food that would last me for all my life.
Answer: Wish granted, but all you get is a piece of poisoned chicken which kills you. But hey, it was enough food for the rest of your life.

Here's another example of a funny one I've seen:
Wish: I wish I had a million bucks.
Answer: Wish granted in the proportion of 250,000 male rabbits, 250,000 male kangaroos, 250,000 male reindeer and 250,000 male goats. You must now personally hand feed all your bucks daily.

I'll start:
I wish I had sushi waiting to be devoured waiting nice and fresh in front of me

Wish granted. but your sushi is soo fresh the fish are still swimming in the tank and you have to catch it.


I wish to win this server with TOP alliance

Wish granted. you need to zerg with the all the quads allies.

I Wish 100 grands

Wish granted you receive 100 grand pianos and have to tune them all yourself

I wish to have enough money to quit my job

Wish granted but you quit your job, got a lot of money, and were forced to take up a new job in order to get the money: by cleaning toilets with a toothbrush (difficult work I tell ya)

I wish to go outdoor paintballing already!!! Indoor is so ZzZ xD

You go out paintballing but while you're out there your car gets stolen with your change of clothes in the back of the car and you have to get the bus home all covered in paint.

I wish the slugs would stop eating my runner beans!

Wish granted they stop eating your runner beans and eat everything else in your garden instead, there is no rain and your runner beans die anyway

I wish my husband to be cancer free

(I thought he was?)

Wish granted but then his cancer transferred to you and your children (god I feel like such an asshole but I can't think of anything else that's terrible xD)

I wish I had a pet white tiger [who also won't eat me for dinner]

wish granted but the mother tigress ate you for stealing his baby
i wish to be immortal

Wish granted but in an unfortunate accident you are decapitated and forced to live with no body forever

i wish to be able to control time

Wish granted though you can only control 1 second every year and you dont know which second it is.

I wish for my pain in my neck and shoulder to go.

P.S Tipsy i knew my last one would be evil